Everything is instant nowadays, so why not love?
When you open your phone you have instant access to news, information, the lives of friends and people you don’t even know. There is an instant answer to nearly everything you may want, and you can have it all with a single click on a button.
Instant meal delivery
Instant music download
Instant love of your life…?
Sounds a bit funny when you see it listed like that. But tell me honestly, have you caught yourself wanting it all and wanting it now? Even when it comes to love?
I believe that the high-speed way of living is contributing to the unrealistic way in which we approach love. And worse – it being the reason those relationships fail with that same kinda high-speed.
Those days of needing to be patient are long gone. There is no more waiting and watching the love bloom petal by petal. Physical presence has been overruled by the phone and whatever virtual ways of connecting we have created to imitate the effects of intimacy.
I am guessing you have had the experience of knowing someones entire life story before actually spending quality time with them. Somehow you thought you knew it all – who they are, what they want and whether it matches with your life’s desires or not.
You jumped into it too fast, too deep, too quick. Especially sexually. You opened up so fast that you actually forgot to first secure the ground and establish a deeper sense of trust.
The evolution of such a relationship happen in quantum loops. It’s like putting chemical fertiliser on organic seeds. On the one hand it’s exciting. On the other hand your heart can’t seem to keep up, and pressure starts to build.
Pressure to become the idealisation.
Pushing yourself to open up more.
The heart wants to grow naturally, and trust in the unfolding. The heart cannot be pushed or commanded. It moves at its own pace, in its own direction. And requires time, patience, presence.
Trust and a deeper sense of security cannot be created by imagining it – it has to be felt and established deep from within.
Not something that “instant love” can provide you with.